Monday, June 11, 2012

Project Icarus-excerpt


Turner examined the corpse with an exhaustion that seeped down far past his bones. He still wasn’t ready to give up his post, but he no longer had the energy to keep fighting. He sighed, his joints creaking in protest as he crouched next to the limp body lying on the asphalt.
The girl couldn’t have been more than twenty years old but it was hard to tell from the state her body was in. She must have been flying home from the grocery store, there was a bag caught in the branches of a tree and a couple of broken protein bars. A dented can of soup lay nearby as if it had fallen from a high altitude. Her fall was probably due to mechanical reasons, after all, even if she was blown slightly off course or performing reckless stunts, there was nothing that she could have had a collision with in the deserted strip of country. Besides, the carnage looked like a straight drop, not a drunken skewed flight path ending in death. It was true that there was a small village down the road where once a week a supply plane would bring the villagers their rations, but the planes took a different route. Occasionally a few young people like the woman on the ground would take a trip to the market to get essentials or food for special occasions, but generally this section of sky was unoccupied.
Turner sighed again. This was the third mechanical failure this month. Wasn’t this new model supposed to prevent this from happening? Of course mechanical failures were always a terrifying reality when the only thing separating you from the ground is beating of feathered strips of aluminum strapped to your back, but before these new Icarus models deaths were counted annually, now they were being tallied monthly.
Turner suspected foul play, but with Dad in power, he didn’t have the resources or the boldness to investigate too deeply. Ever since the war and the rise of the dictator called ‘Dad’, the independent police force had been steadily waning. Once Turner worked with more than twenty other people, each man specializing in a specific field, whether that be mortician or inspector or detective, but now only Sebastian Turner was left. It wasn’t too difficult, Turner had learned to cope by himself, but he was tired, and he was just trying to stave off his retirement just a little bit longer.
There was nothing intrinsically wrong with Dad’s police force, but Turner was a firm believer in having empathy with the people of the town being watched over. It was true that Dad’s agents had better training and more resources, but they didn’t connect with the people and Turner wasn’t quite ready to allow the police station to be in the possession of those kinds of people. He was losing the battle though, so all he could do was think longingly of the coffee machine at the station and carefully load the girl into the back of his van.
Vans had become a rarity in recent times. So many people relied on their wings for their daily transport that the crowded roads had been abandoned in favor of the open sky and honest people no longer used them. Turner was very proud of his van, he’d scrounged it out of the dump ten years ago and was able to scavenge all the necessary parts to make it start working again, but he’d learned not to talk about it in polite company.
Ever since the common man’s abandonment of them, the roads belonged to the criminals. It galled Turner to no end that every day he drove past these delinquents, but he didn’t have the resources to arrest them, and if he started to drive them out but didn’t finish, he would no longer have use of the roads. Good citizens called in a government plane when they had loads that were too heavy for them to fly with, only suspicious characters who didn’t want the government to know what they were carrying used the roads instead. Turner tried to keep any contact with his new government to a minimum, so he felt that the odd judging glance or awkward conversation was worth avoiding the planes.
The constant rousing jostling of the decaying road served to keep Turner somewhat awake on the long moonlit drive back to the station. He had started swerving a couple of times in the last ten miles, but the roads were empty and he made it to the station safely. After messily pulling up in front of the station, Turner unloaded the van, fumbling with his keys as he unlocked the station door and dragged the girl’s body onto an examination table, messily hiding the corpse under a sheet and telling himself he would deal with the proper examination and paperwork in the morning. Then, realizing he would probably fall asleep on the road if he tried to drive home, he retired to his office and fitted his body into the well-molded dips and depressions of the couch that he had fallen asleep on too many times.
(Full story can be found in Carry the Light, page 140, available on Amazon)

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Acting Scene


So this was a scene I wrote for my acting class last year... Enjoy!

(Emily and Jerry (17)  are in a hospital waiting room; Emily’s mother is in critical condition after purposely overdosing in an effort to kill herself. Everybody is waiting for her to die, and this is the last time Emily will get to speak to her.)

Emily: It’s so cold!

Jerry: Well that’s to be expected in place like this…

Emily: Yeah I guess so… but it really shouldn’t be. Anyway thanks for being here with me.

Jerry: It looked like you needed it

Emily: This has just been really hard for me. I just… I need a friend right now

Jerry: Well I’m here for you, you know that. Hey, are you still cold?

Emily: Yeah, why?

Jerry: Well do you want to maybe borrow my coat?

Emily: Thanks Jerry… God I NEED to stop saying that word… it seems like that’s all I ever say these days. People come up to me at school and say “Oh I’m so sorry for your loss Emily”, or “You are so brave, I can’t believe you have to go through this” or the worst, “I know what you must be going through, but you’ll get through it” and I just want to scream at them, tell them that no, they don’t know what I’m going through, and what if I don’t want to get through it and that SHE HASN’T DIED YET so they can’t be sorry for my “loss” because she’s STLL HERE! But instead I just meekly sand there and say “thanks”.

Jerry: You can yell at me if you want to. I’ll let you. And you don’t ever need to thank me either. Just being with you is enough for me, is there anything I can do for you?

Emily: Oh Jerry… I wish you could help, I really do, but I don’t know what to do… sometimes I think she was the smart one. IS IS the smart one. Sometimes I feel the urge to end it all too…

Jerry: and then you think about your family and how much they need you and you realize that you would ruin their lives if you did? That they need you? How will your dad survive if both you AND your mom are gone?

Jerry: Emily… what would I do if you… if you… jumped off a building or tried to drown yourself or something?  

Emily: I don’t care. My dad will get on with his life

Jerry: What about the people at school, all your friends? How would they feel?

Emily: They would feel nothing, it’s not like they care.

Jerry: And what about me?

Emily: … yes …

Jerry: What?

Emily: yes. You are the reason I’m still alive. And you have no idea how close I have come. After cooking dinner, I’ve held a knife to my heart, my hand trembling. Some of my clothes even have a tear and a red stain right over my heart, that’s how close I have come. I’ve broke into the alcohol closet, not that it’s ever locked anymore, and you’ve seen me on the roofs, over looking our city. But I never do it. I look out over the rooftops, or at my trembling hand, and I try to think of the things that make life worth living. I’ll admit, it’s difficult at first, but then I think of poetry and my favorite books…

Jerry: Yeah but the character’s lives in your favorite books are shit. How does that make you feel better?

Emily: Because they all had something, or more often, someone to live for.

Jerry…

Emily: My someone is you.

Jerry: I love you Emily.

Nurse: Ms.Mayburry?

Emily: It’s time. Jerry, will you come with me? I don’t want to have to face this alone.

Jerry: Of course.

Emily: And Jerry… I love you too

They walk out

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Audition


The entire audience was focused on me. I wasn't ready. I trembled under it's gaze as I took the stage. I wished I could sink straight through floorboards, or dissapear behind a fast curtain, I'd even be happy if a fire suddenly started and we had to evacuate the building. I just needed something to prevent this audition from happening. 
As I looked at my audience I desperately tried the underwear trick, but I couldn't make myself focus. I could only focus on their eyes. Their eyes were expectant, waiting to judge me. The underwear thing wasn't working. I started to panic, my breath coming in shorter and shorter gasps as my face blanched as all the color drained from my face. I couldn't do this, I needed to get out of here, but just as I was about to walk out, I thought of my best friend. Rea's face was smiling and I could see the encouagement sparkling in her eyes. It was just as if she never left. If she were here I'd be able to do this. 
I would give myself one more try. I took a deep breath and envisioned Rea at the back of the room.  I focused on her, blocking out my audience completely, and worked to stop hyperventilating. This time when I took a deep breath I searched for my character. Eponine was hiding in my head somewhere. I searched through my mind, remembering her objectives and obstacles until I stopped thinking as me and I became her. I was ready now. Maruis had abonded me, left me while he went off with Cozette, that beautiful wonderful girl that a street rat like me could never compare to. I didn't blame him, but that didn't make me feel any better. I opened my mouth to share my feelings with him and to prove to myself that I could do this. I waited for the piano, and then locked my eyes on Rea as I started to sing. 
"And now I'm all alone again,
Nowhere to turn no one to go to,"
In that moment, as I spoke those potent words and stared at my best friend, I forgot all about Eponine. This wasn't about her and Marius, this was about me and Rea. I took that hurt, the betrayal I felt after each excuse she used to avoid seeing me these days, I stole that pent up emotion from the depth of my soul and let it flow into the song. The anger at her avoidance, the sense of loss of my best friend, and finally the acceptance, when I finally understood she didn't want me anymore and stopped bothering her. She had him, she no longer needed me. Gone were the days of watching spongebob and listening to musicals. She'd moved on. It was time for me now, but I couldn't let go. Eponine clung to Marius and I was just as unwilling to give up Rea.
It was with a heart rending sob that I ended the painful experience and and reminded myself, after all the anger and bitterness,
"I love him,
I love him,
I love him,"
and then with a barely audible sigh, 
"but only on my own." 
I realized that I was shaking again and my eyes were moist. I started to see the audience again and to my utter disbelief they all looked awed. Then, as if awakening from a trance, they started to clap.
I left the stage, grateful that my time in the spotlight was over, but feeling sort of empty inside. I stumbled outside the theatre to get some fresh air.  The cool oxygen calmed me. While I was standing there I felt the emptiness start to recede a little bit. I was far from ok, but I figured my experience at the audition was the first step towards letting go. It was by no means painless, but it was a start.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

A Box

A box
A simple box
Made only of cardboard.
It is a humble box, meant only for sitting in a corner, just taking up space.
To an adult.
But a kid can see through the box’s clever disguise
A kid knows that the box, which had before contained nothing but air, is really a time machine, a vehicle that can cut through the fourth dimension to take him whenever he wants to go.
Annalise knows that the box is a castle, with a great big dragon guarding the beautiful princess inside.
Jimmy sees a mighty Stallion, a horse too wild to be tamed. He shakes as he approaches.
Elena sees a submarine, to take her to the bottom of the deep blue sea.
Terri sees a tree. Its roots stretching to the bottom of the earth and it’s branches to the sky.
Adam sees one soldier of a mighty army, ready to fight for his Queen.
Mrs. Wilkinson sees nothing but cardboard.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

I finally have another post!

I am SOOO sorry about the delay... that really was disgraceful. I have a couple of projects I'm working on, but with school starting I'm going to become much more efficient at procrastinating so if I have any readers left, please bear with me while I try to get a schedule straight. This piece is part of a diary entry of a girl who's summer is ending and she's trying to decide how she feels about some boys she recently met. And she still has a crush at school to deal with aswell. 

          Everyone says that when you light up for a person then you're in love. That makes sense, I mean love means a person that it makes you happy to be around, that doesn't judge you and loves you  for who you are. So if there's a guy that fulfills all these requirements, makes me smile, sees me for who I am and that I miss so much it's almost a physical pain, does that mean I'm in love? What if I only knew him for a week and now we're half a country apart? Now it sounds like I'm describing love at first sight, but that's not it either. I mean, first we just ignored each other, but we became friends when we realized we actually had things to talk about. Still, I never thought about him this much when I saw him every day. So is this love? Will I feel like this when I see him again? Is that how it works? And am I a whore if I feel the same way about another guy? Well that's enough for one night... school will be quite interesting tomorrow...

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Acting Camp!

Hi all!

I really appreciate your reading my stories and posts and promise I will have more material for you soon. Unfortunately I will be going the next week without internet connection because I will be in the hills of San Bernadino for an Acting camp- camp Bravo. I am very excited but this but unfortunately it means that I will not be able to post for the next week. But fear not brave readers! I am currently working on a short story about a dragon and his brush with death and I should have that ready soon after I come back!

I will post more soon, but until then don't hesitate to comment on what's already here.
Thank you!

Friday, July 22, 2011

Yearbook


I pick up my high school yearbook. It’s a blue hardbound book. Nothing more. Each person inside is a character. Some are main characters and some supporting, but they all feel. And they all develop. They are all their own main character, each with a story of their own.

Kate is the soccer star, but nobody understands her. They think she is self-centered, cares only about herself.  Thinks soccer is more important than anything else. All she wants are true friends.

Cass is the weird one. She is outgoing and not afraid to express herself. She wears a different crazy outfit every day. The popular girls shun her, but they don’t know that she has friends she trusts and loves.

Evan loves Emily, he has since the fifth grade, but she’s way out of his league.

Emily is popular, and hot, but she’s always felt something is missing.

John is a bully, and his mom has cancer. There’s a reason he calls Jake emo.

Jake wears all black and dyed his hair. His hood is always over his head, but he’s just interested in the culture.

Jessica is a party animal. She needs the alcohol after her best friend killed herself.

Adam is gay. But he’s afraid of his feelings. It’s not until college that he comes out.

Brittney stays up every night, crying for the sister she never had.

I am a writer. I tell their stories.